Twin Flames

If you’ve read my Cin & Gui series or any of the books in that shared universe, or my Lightbeard’s School for the Broken series, you know that twin flames are a part of the story.

But what are they?

Essentially, twin flames are one soul in two bodies. One soul is the masculine polarity and the other is the feminine polarity. The polarity aspect is important because this is one of the ways that this specific soul connection is different from something like soulmates. Soulmates are souls of a very similar energetic signature, while twin flames are the same energetic signature, but the two souls are manifesting a different polarity.

This is easier to understand if we consider the twin flames like a simultaneous reincarnation. While most yogis, gurus, and those who have done research into the soul like Michael Newton, adamantly claim that twin flames are not real, they tend to agree that the soul will sometimes practice simultaneous reincarnation. Simultaneous reincarnation means that a soul has two distinct incarnations happening at the same point in time. When a soul does this, it will usually choose to have the two different bodies living in far away locations without any chance of meeting during their lifetime. The reasons a soul might do this are typically beyond human understanding, but we can guess that it might be for accelerated evolution of the soul and for other purposes related to larger narratives applicable to the human collective.

Soulmates are usually born as souls at the same time, splitting off from source energy at once. Because they were formed at the same time, their energetic signature is nearly identical and therefore familiar. It’s like how a physical family on Earth carries similar traits that tell them: family. These souls will continue for eons of time as a family, evolving together and incarnating as a group, choosing different roles that play together throughout an incarnation.

So, sometimes two souls will choose to be lovers in one lifetime and might have a contract to do that in order to have a peaceful life where they have kids together. This might be a restful life, in between more difficult incarnations when considered from a linear perspective. Soulmates can choose to be born as siblings, cousins, or lovers, and sometimes parents.

But whatever they choose, the soulmate or soul-family relationship is not the same as a twin flame relationship.

Here are some distinctions between a soulmate and twin flame:

Soulmate

• Magnetic pull to be together
• Feels very familiar, like home
• A sudden sense that past lives are a reality, not a fantasy for the romantically inclined
• Powerful, stable love that awakens very quickly.
• Being together is easy and comforting
• Reuniting after time apart is easy, and feels as though no time has elapsed at all
• They awaken a sense of the infinite in you

Twin Flame

• Magnetic pull to be together
• Feels very familiar, like home
• A profound sense of unconditional love
• Looking into their eyes causes an intense physical reaction that feels both pleasant and jarring
• Looking into their eyes in a photo can cause the same reaction
• If the twins have the opportunity to hug, there is a sense that they should never let go. May cause a physical reaction that could be described like their heart has split open
• Initially, being together is incredible and the universe provides opportunities for this to happen
• Time elapses very quickly when they’re together; sometimes, if one has a physical ailment, being together mysteriously heals this ailment, though they may initially attribute it to something else
• After a while, one of the twins realizes the connection is something beyond the ordinary, but they can’t explain it
• When this is understood, one person inexplicably runs away, and the other begins to chase
• This causes a new phase of the dynamic typically called separation
• Quite often, the two twins are separated by very large geographical distances
• Due to distance and the fact that often, the two twins are already in a committed relationship of some kind, telepathy begins to happen between the twins and this causes either one or both of them to begin investigating why and how this is happening
• Paralellisms: the twins might notice that they have strangely similar situations despite being from distinct cultures or countries or having vastly different backgrounds. Such as: similar pivotal childhood moments like broken bones, divorced parents at the same age, or parents having similar trauma that was then passed on to the twin just to name a few.
• They will also often pursue the same dreams or careers almost as though it’s an extension of a past life. They will also often share the same passions and likes and dislikes because they’ve been connected energetically their entire life, but at the same time, they will have extreme polarities in other things due to the way their energy was separated pre-incarnation.

But wait! There’s more…

And that’s one of the things about twin flames… it’s not cute and easy and simple, the way soulmates are. So if you’ve found yourself looking up information about soulmates and it feels… sigh… just so nice, that’s excellent! Pray that you’ve found a soulmate and not a twin flame.

Because while there’s a lot of beauty in the twin flame experience, the easier part of the journey doesn’t happen till way after all the hard stuff. The following is just some of the hard stuff:

• During separation, the roles can switch between who is chasing and who is running
• In this silent phase, spiritual gifts are activated such as telepathy, energetic/astral travel, and communication with guides, angels, and other beings from higher vibrational planes of existence
• The twins begin to sense each other’s pain. This is one of the reasons separation happens—when there’s a lot of negative emotional trauma that hasn’t been transmuted, its vibration is felt between the twins. This becomes very overpowering because it’s felt on many energetic levels (physical and emotional) and it causes them to push apart. The twin who usually runs is the often called the masculine polarity
• Twins trigger each other’s deepest childhood traumas and core wounds, forcing each other to heal
• It is an awakening and spiritual journey
• The twins may never figure their journey out or try to live in a traditional relationship
• Every set of twin flames has specifically designed their blueprint and it’s unique to them, and only they can figure it out
• From what I have seen, psychics, coaches, or any other spiritually gifted third party is unable to see and attest to the connection (typically, if one claims to, my feeling is that they may be lying). This seems to be intentional because one of the purposes of the twin flame journey is for each twin to learn discernment and self-reliance, shedding any need for external validation. It’s a journey of self-mastery and liberation from the grip of the 3D world

The bullet points could go on for eternity.

I would like to add that because every twin flame dynamic is different, some of these bullet points don’t apply. I know of twin flames who experienced very little of the running and chasing. It’s entirely circumstantial and contextual.

Some say that twins aren’t meant to have a traditional romantic relationship and some say they are. However, from what I have seen, one of the intentions of the journey seems to be about learning the profound and powerful ability to manifest whatever reality one wishes. A twin who wishes to not create the reality of physical union with their twin can do that. Easily. But a twin who wishes to manifest the reality of physical union with their twin can also do that. One of the limitations of the TF journey is time. Transcending time is key, meaning that learning to not judge the future on the moment. Many twins get trapped in illusion of the moment and this leads to bitterness and depression, which leads to manifesting more of that in their physical world.

There’s a lot of information out there, what I’ve written here comes from my experience on the journey. Because it’s constantly evolving and I am too, some of my perspectives will likely change.

Those who say twin flames aren’t real are of course free to say that. I wouldn’t believe it myself if I hadn’t found myself on the journey in 2019. It’s taken me years to sort through the many twists and turns and painful experiences, as well as the beautiful experiences.

In my Lightbeard series, Lightbeard and Amanita often say that theory without practice is dead, and practice without theory is dead. This experience is like that. It’s likely that it can only be believed from within the experience itself.

—Nicole Grotepas, June 2025